The babies have left the nest.

I remember the first time I had a total melt down. I remember like it was yesterday. I actually still had the baby boy who is now 21 at home, but at the time he was 14. I had dropped him off to basketball practice and instead of sitting in the parking lot at the gym I decided to go to the nearby Mexican restaurant. As I sat there alone looking at the menu, these huge crocodile tears burst from my eyes as the waiter approached to take my order. I was a mess. I ended up calling my daughter, the only girl and my second born son. Just hearing their voice made me feel so much better, even though I was bawling to try to explain what was going on. Of course, they didn't know what was happening, thinking something was wrong.

Nope just your mom having a moment. It was my very first time having a meal alone in a restaurant in my 39 yrs of life, and it was overwhelming. After explaining this to the kids and hearing them laugh me, I realized how silly I sounded. Not knowing that this was only the beginning of a 3 year rollercoaster of emotions, that would push me into a whole new world and a whole new life as I knew it. The depression was real and I had to face it, figure it out and overcome.